Actor Mayim Bialik

[vasu]

yeah that post looks like run of the mill posts from Miss Bialik.....

like...

I am better than everyone else.....i don't do this ,i don't do that.....lol

I don't like how women are portrayed in hollywood.....yet I will continue to work in a show which does the same......

Edited April 21, 2015 by vasu

[luke]

Then IMHO she should have kept her mouth shut and not said a damn thing, at least until she's come to terms with her grief. A simple "my father died, I'm still grieving, I'll be back soon, thank you for all your well wishes" would have sufficed, rather than saying something thoughtless (again) and pissing off some of her fans (again). Honestly, I love her work, but she's an absolute disaster when it comes to knowing when and what to say on social media.

 

I flashed back to the death of my father, too, but to put it bluntly, nobody cares what Mayim is thinking and feeling. They're just offering their condolences, they're not in the "grieving someone's death" equivalent of a dick-measuring contest.

 

 

So, you respond to Mayim's comments about people not knowing how she feels by saying you don't care how she feels? - I think you just made her point.

[phantagrae]

So, you respond to Mayim's comments about people not knowing how she feels by saying you don't care how she feels? - I think you just made her point.

 

I don't think that was her point at all.  Her point was that "no matter how sympathetic you may try to be, you don't understand how I feel because it's my father and my relationship, not yours with your parent."

 

And again, I think that she was truly trying to somehow express how heartbroken she is and what a special relationship she had with her father, but she's also kind of saying that no one's sympathy (or understanding of the loss of a parent) is as real as her feelings.  I think that's true in some ways, but not true in other ways.

[Martin Pollard]

So, you respond to Mayim's comments about people not knowing how she feels by saying you don't care how she feels? - I think you just made her point.

 

Yeah, I did, except for the part where I completely didn't. Try again.

[Carlilla]

It is a sensitive issue and I do not want to be disrespectful but Mayim is condescending.

She says:" I do it in this way and you do it in you way. You way is ok, but my way is better".

Mayim sometimes is like that. And today I feel the same. But I say again: People feel the pain in many ways, this is her way...

Im sorry for her, this moments are hard but sometimes she should shut up...

[Kathy2611]

I love her work and think she's an awesome actress but yeah, for someone who's in the public eye, she really does need to start choosing her words wisely or sadly, she's going to once again, insert her foot in her mouth and it's going to come back and bite her in the ass really hard.

[stardustmelody]

Ok...people...you are talking about someone in pain.  While she may have come across a bit condescending, I am sure that was never her intent.  She is in pain, she is angry, she is grieving and yes she feels alone in this.  Her mother isn't the most comforting of individuals and they don't have the happiest of relationships.  Now she not only has her own grief to deal with but her mothers as well.  This is a horrible time for her and she may not have been the best at word smithing when she posted that because her mind was on many things...her children, her mother and yes her own pain.   I think it is unfair to pass a judgment on ANYONE when they are suffering and may not choose the best words.   Try and be a bit more compassionate because I see some people passing judgment on her and sounding angry with her when she is at her worst time.   Put on her shoes and see how it feels to be knocked down when you are already your lowest.   Show some compassion and for once show her some grace.

[Trinabeana78]

I honestly can't believe that people are critiquing a blog post that Mayim made, in the midst of her grief, about her father dying, less than 2 weeks after he passed away. This isn't like her blogging about Frozen, or Ariana Grande, or whatever. Grief is much more personal & different for everyone.

Seriously, maybe she could have said it differently or maybe she should have waited. But the fans were wondering and asking her co-workers where she was. I immediately got what she was saying and wasn't offended at all. And nowhere did she say her way of grieving was better. She just said that you can't tell her you know how she feels because you don't. Her father and their relationship was completely unique to them. Her exact feelings won't be the same as anyone else's.

And MP, you may say that no one cares what Mayim is thinking and feeling, but I do. I'm glad she wrote out some of her feelings about it. I think it helps her to write it out, which may be why it was a few paragraphs instead of one sentence. And if a few paragraphs from a grieving daughter offend some people? Oh well, I'm sure she's used to it by now because people will find something wrong in almost everything she posts.

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[MsTeller]

With all due respect, I think there is a difference between being condescending and rudely slapping the face of those who are offering their support. This crossed the line into the latter. Yes grieving is complicated but when I have lost my own family members I have at least had the manners to respectfully say thank you to those who offered their love and condolences. But then again I am merely an atheist who evidently can not relate to the human emotions experienced by those of faith.

[stardustmelody]

I honestly can't believe that people are critiquing a blog post that Mayim made, in the midst of her grief, about her father dying, less than 2 weeks after he passed away. This isn't like her blogging about Frozen, or Ariana Grande, or whatever. Grief is much more personal & different for everyone.

Seriously, maybe she could have said it differently or maybe she should have waited. But the fans were wondering and asking her co-workers where she was. I immediately got what she was saying and wasn't offended at all. And nowhere did she say her way of grieving was better. She just said that you can't tell her you know how she feels because you don't. Her father and their relationship was completely unique to them. Her exact feelings won't be the same as anyone else's.

And MP, you may say that no one cares what Mayim is thinking and feeling, but I do. I'm glad she wrote out some of her feelings about it. I think it helps her to write it out, which may be why it was a few paragraphs instead of one sentence. And if a few paragraphs from a grieving daughter offend some people? Oh well, I'm sure she's used to it by now because people will find something wrong in almost everything she posts.

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Thank you, I fully agree!

[Joyzeefan23]

No. She said it fine. It's a recent loss. She is allowed to be upset. She is allowed to be mad at the world sometimes and she's allowed to say her pain hurts the most. That's fine. She's dealing with it.

Its her personal blog. She wrote what she felt.

Why would "I" put my general feelings and feel like she slapped me in the face? How selfish is that? Let her grieve in her own way. She doesn't need to explain her hurt to anyone.

It's enough that she shared why she was away when she said she was going to be back days later. That's enough. No one has the right to criticize or expect something for themselves on a person that is grieving.

[karyshamy]

What I got from her post is:

Her grief, her pain = she is the one who knows how much she is suffering. It can't be translated into words, and anyway it only matters to her.

"Sorry for your loss, I hope you get well soon, etc" = this is supportive

"I know how you feel" = doesn't help at all

[xjax]

What I got from her post is:

Her grief, her pain = she is the one who knows how much she is suffering. It can't be translated into words, and anyway it only matters to her.

"Sorry for your loss, I hope you get well soon, etc" = this is supportive

"I know how you feel" = doesn't help at all

Agree 100 %...exactly how I understood...   

[Sara Smile]

What I got from her post is:

Her grief, her pain = she is the one who knows how much she is suffering. It can't be translated into words, and anyway it only matters to her.

"Sorry for your loss, I hope you get well soon, etc" = this is supportive

"I know how you feel" = doesn't help at all

If it's so bothersome and offensive to read her fans writing " I know how you feel", then why didn't Mayim just turn her comments off on her blog?

I'm sorry but there is nothing wrong with anyone writing " I know how you feel", because guess what, people do know how she feels. She is not the first or last female to lose her father.

[MTBigBangTheoryFan]

I have read and heard many times that one thing you should never say to someone after they lose a love one is: " I know how you feel" 

 

I understood what Mayim meant. 

Edited April 22, 2015 by MTBigBangTheoryFan

[Sara Smile]

Grieving or not, that was a pretty callous and disrespectful thing to say to people who are simply trying to offer sympathy. (And I'm going to stop right now before I let loose with some rather choice expletives...)

Agree. You took the words right out of my mouth.

[karyshamy]

If it's so bothersome and offensive to read her fans writing " I know how you feel", then why didn't Mayim just turn her comments off on her blog?

I'm sorry but there is nothing wrong with anyone writing " I know how you feel", because guess what, people do know how she feels. She is not the first or last female to lose her father.

Maybe you should ask her. Why bother so much about it?

I have read and heard many times that one thing you should never say to someone after they lose a love one is: " I know how you feel"

I understood what Mayim meant.

Exactly. The same way that questions from reporters like "you've just lost your father, how do you feel?" are totally uncalled for.

I believe how much we suffer or how much a problem affects us can't be compared. My life is different from yours. How can my problems feel the same as yours?

[Sara Smile]

Maybe you should ask her. Why bother so much about it?

I'm not bothered by it,and I'm not going to ask her about it. I just thought Mayim came off as condescending. If it bothers her for people to express sympathy, she should turn her comments off. She has comments open for people to offer condelences, yet she doesn't like what they say. So she should just turn her commenting feature off if it bothers her so much.

[MTBigBangTheoryFan]

Maybe you should ask her. Why bother so much about it?

Exactly. The same way that questions from reporters like "you've just lost your father, how do you feel?" are totally uncalled for.

I believe how much we suffer or how much a problem affects us can't be compared. My life is different from yours. How can my problems feel the same as yours?

 

Exactly. Person A and Person B both lose a Father. They both know What it like to  lose a Father but they don't feel the same way because the loss feels different to both people. 

 

Saying "I know what it like to lose a Father" is probably almost better then "I Know how your feel" 

Edited April 22, 2015 by MTBigBangTheoryFan

[Sara Smile]

Maybe you should ask her. Why bother so much about it?

Exactly. The same way that questions from reporters like "you've just lost your father, how do you feel?" are totally uncalled for.

I believe how much we suffer or how much a problem affects us can't be compared. My life is different from yours. How can my problems feel the same as yours?

Reporters are not on her page asking her how she feels. Of the comments I read, it was people saying things like ( this is just an example)- I know how you feel, my father and I were close and I remember the day he died and how I feel sad all these years later. What's so awful about that?

[karyshamy]

I'm not bothered by it,and I'm not going to ask her about it. I just thought Mayim came off as condescending. If it bothers her for people to express sympathy, she should turn her comments off. She has comments open for people to offer condelences, yet she doesn't like what they say. So she should just turn her commenting feature off if it bothers her so much.

Then what you're saying is essentially that people can't disagree. By expressing her opinion there in an open blog she is probably very aware that people might think different.

The same is, although I disagree with you, it doesn't mean we can't talk. [emoji6]

Reporters are not on her page asking her how she feels. Of the comments I read, it was people saying things like ( this is just an example)- I know how you feel, my father and I were close and I remember the day he died and how I feel sad all these years later. What's so awful about that?

The reporters thing was just another example.

And saying that may sound like her pain is banal. It's just like everybody's... Isn't it?

Maybe that's why it feels awful.

Edited April 22, 2015 by karyshamy

[Sara Smile]

Then what you're saying is essentially that people can't disagree. By expressing her opinion there in an open blog she is probably very aware that people might think different.

The same is, although I disagree with you, it doesn't mean we can't talk. [emoji6]

My brain is starting to hurt from this! Lol! Yes, people can disagree. But by her being a celebrity with an open blog, she has to know that people are going to offer their sympathies. If she doesn't like the sympathies being offered, why not just turn the comments off is all I'm trying to say.

[karyshamy]

My brain is starting to hurt from this! Lol! Yes, people can disagree. But by her being a celebrity with an open blog, she has to know that people are going to offer their sympathies. If she doesn't like the sympathies being offered, why not just turn the comments off is all I'm trying to say.

Mine too, I hate long discussions... By the way, my cat looks a lot like yours [emoji4]

[Sara Smile]

Mine too, I hate long discussions... By the way, my cat looks a lot like yours [emoji4]

I have 2 Siamese cats, the one pictured is a seal point and the other is a blue point. The one in the pic is naughty and likes to bully my other cats, my blue point girl is total opposite,sweet and loving. I have a tabby and a maine coon also. They are all spoiled rotten!

[Carlos]

There's a very simple issue I think it's not being considered: I'm sure Mayim is intelligent enough to know that if she posts about the death of her father in a public blog, she's going to elicit some kind of reaction, otherwise why post it at all? Celebrity or not she's not obliged to do so, right? She can choose what to write, so I find the fact that she's being condescending with people offering her their sympathies inappropriate at best. If to that you add the fact that you're basically implying that your grief is more profound than all others it makes things worse. If she didn't want to be bothered by people's reactions (even positive ones) she should have grieved in silence.