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[Spoilers] Shamy: Season 9


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But you all sound as if Amy was an innocent victim who did nothing wrong! "He brought this on himself " but is it really HIS fault he started dating a girl who was pretty much like him and suddenly decided she wanted romance and physical intimacy, and instead of being comprehensive of his fears / phobias / issues pushed him over and over and over? Is it his fault she always diminishes his efforts ( all I get in 5 years is a distracted make-out session )? Is it his fault she seems to be always dissatisfied whatever good he does?

 

If that was that much difficult for her to deal with someone so reluctant why wait 5 years?

 

I can't help but strongly disagree. He may need to mature but she surely needs to stop expecting a " normal " boyfriend and understand for good that as long as she wants Sheldon in her life - which is far from being proven up to now, she has no real reason to ever come back to him right now - she has to accept him as he is and not try to change him.

No, Cherry, Sheldon is not all at fault.    My prior posts defending him in this area still stand.    It's just that I see a fuller picture now from Amy's POV, and that of their friends.

You are right. She is the one who changed the expectations in the relationship and expected him to change with her, but Sheldon chose to let himself be dragged along knowing she wanted more by giving her promises of hope while continuing to drag out the pace.   He didn't try to get out, and the one time he did over a table, he let Amy talk him out of it.  

Amy failed in not letting him know she was reaching the end of her rope to give him a chance to rectify the problem.  She enabled him by not putting her foot down but continued giving in to his will.   Sheldon got comfortable with the homeostasis and just assumed it would remain so until he decided he was ready to change it because she never communicated there was a problem.   When they did speak, she used sarcasm which she knows he doesn't understand. She stops talking to him all together making the matter worse and driving him so bonkers that he goes and kills his chances at winning her back by being himself.

Amy is not trying to change Sheldon.   She keeps defending who he is to all her friends.   She loves the man to pieces for who he is.  She just needs for him to mature, to accept responsibility, make her a priority, and to tell her how he feels rather than express himself with insults in her direction.

I look back at Seasons 4 - 7 and how we hated the way Sheldon treated Amy and wanted her to knock him senseless.   Now that she has we (including me), are pissed off at her for doing it as if to say it's okay to continue putting up with it because we know Sheldon loves her and has a ring.

Kathy is correct.   Sheldon had not come to grips with his feelings for Amy after the train trip, so a break up then wouldn't have had the effect that is has on him now that he's told her he loves her, considered raising a turtle with her, filled out an app to live on Mars and have Martian babies, spent the night with her in his fort, and kissed her on the couch contemplating a proposal.   These are the things that are going to stir change in Sheldon and what have made the break up, not a permanent separation, but a powerful tool in building a stronger Shamy when they are back together.

I've come to realize that if I put my emotion to the side, things get a lot clearer.

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Sorry but I think you are missing the point here. Has Amy ever stated that she wanted a " normal boyfriend " ? I can think of at least 2 occurences. And why complaining about " getting a distracted make out session in 5 years ". Would she have only thought, 5 years ago, that she would get a make-out session at all?


She's never happy with what he gives. That's a fact.

 

I'm not saying that Sheldon doesn't need to show respect and how important she is.

What I'm saying is that Sheldon is not the only one to blame here. And therefore not the only one to improve for the reconciliation.

Edited by Cherry
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I can appreciate that Amy is trying to find her own path, without the influence of her friends.  To learn to stand up for herself, to go after what she wants and needs.  I think it's important for her development.  She was herself, and there were men interested in knowing her better.  So that is good for the ego for sure.

What irks me, is that she hasn't shown that she misses Sheldon.  There must have been something special about him wasn't there that she loved?  This whole storyline arc seems so focused on that Sheldon was this bad boyfriend, and he needs to fix himself.  I agree, he needs to work on himself.  I, as a viewer need to see that Amy loves Sheldon also.  Like truly loves him.  Or else, she should just go off and date someone else, that meet all her requirements, since she's behaving like Sheldon wasn't that special to her.

Sorry for the negative mood today.  = (

 

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Sorry but I think you are missing the point here. Has Amy ever stated that she wanted a " normal boyfriend " ? I can think of at least 2 occurences. And why complaining about " getting a distracted make out session in 5 years ". Would she have only thought, 5 years ago, that she would get a make-out session at all?


She's never happy with what he gives. That's a fact.

 

I'm not saying that Sheldon doesn't need to rshow respect and how important she is.

What I'm saying is that Sheldon is not the only one to blame here. And therefonre not the only one to improve for the reconciliation.

Yes, she had said those things, out of frustration. Sheldon had also said pretty terrible things, like whishing she were dead, no less, this because he was angry at her, do you think he also heartfully meant that just because he said it?

You keep mentioning the five years time-span, well, that only shows she had been very patient with him!, why else would she stay for so long if not because she really likes/loves him? but we all have a breaking point.

And I'm convinced that if Sheldon would have approached her calmly and nicely instead of agressively in 9.1 (as he did after she got upset after the Mars thing) the break up wouldn't even have existed! Of course, the writers went the other path because they wanted to keep them separated (hopefully, because they want them to have a better relationship when they finally reunite)

What irks me, is that she hasn't shown that she misses Sheldon.  There must have been something special about him wasn't there that she loved?  This whole storyline arc seems so focused on that Sheldon was this bad boyfriend, and he needs to fix himself.  I agree, he needs to work on himself.  I, as a viewer need to see that Amy loves Sheldon also.  Like truly loves him.  Or else, she should just go off and date someone else, that meet all her requirements, since she's behaving like Sheldon wasn't that special to her.

 

I'm also not a fan of Sheldon being shown in the latest episodes looking for a new girlfriend, just wanting to 'fill the void' to ease his own pain and not saying at least once that what he really wants is Amy and nobody else, how does that show that Amy was special to him?

 

 

 

Edited by sarah7
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I can appreciate that Amy is trying to find her own path, without the influence of her friends.  To learn to stand up for herself, to go after what she wants and needs.  I think it's important for her development.  She was herself, and there were men interested in knowing her better.  So that is good for the ego for sure.

What irks me, is that she hasn't shown that she misses Sheldon.  There must have been something special about him wasn't there that she loved?  This whole storyline arc seems so focused on that Sheldon was this bad boyfriend, and he needs to fix himself.  I agree, he needs to work on himself.  I, as a viewer need to see that Amy loves Sheldon also.  Like truly loves him.  Or else, she should just go off and date someone else, that meet all her requirements, since she's behaving like Sheldon wasn't that special to her.

Sorry for the negative mood today.  = (

 

Well I think the hallway scene in episode 5 shows that she obviously still cares about him, and misses him. 

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<snip>

What irks me, is that she hasn't shown that she misses Sheldon.  There must have been something special about him wasn't there that she loved?  This whole storyline arc seems so focused on that Sheldon was this bad boyfriend, and he needs to fix himself.  I agree, he needs to work on himself.  I, as a viewer need to see that Amy loves Sheldon also.  Like truly loves him.  Or else, she should just go off and date someone else, that meet all her requirements, since she's behaving like Sheldon wasn't that special to her.

 

I'm with you.   That is the reason I've been so angry with Amy.   However, I no longer believe it is absent.  I think she's hiding it, bottling everything up.   

I really think it will all be revealed when she talks to Sheldon, because as she wants Sheldon to do for her, he's the only one who deserves to know and it doesn't belong to anyone else to do so.    I think it could be a real bonding moment for them for her to tell Sheldon she never stopped loving him, that she's been doing it from a distance while trying to sort things out.

 

Edited by jenafan
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I'm also not a fan of Sheldon being shown in the latest episodes looking for a new girlfriend, just wanting to 'fill the void' to ease his own pain and not saying at least once that what he really wants is Amy and nobody else, how does that show that Amy was special to him?

I think they've shown lots of examples in the show that shows how much Sheldon misses Amy.   He was clearly upset in the 2003 episode when he was resigned that Amy would marry someone so much better than him.  His two best friends have told him how miserable he makes Amy.  He looked heartbroken when Kripke sounded interested in asking Amy out. He keeps mentioning relationships because it's clearly weighing on his mind.   Why should he say he wants nobody but Amy, when everyone around him is telling him he's not good enough for her in the first place.  The friends are confirming his belief that she would be happier without him.  He's been rejected as a viable option in his head, and he's hurt about it.

How have they shown Amy show she misses Sheldon.  They haven't.  At least not yet.  Their girl's night, she didn't seem heartbroken or sad.  When Penny called her immediately after the break up, she seemed more upset that she wasn't invited to their wedding that the fact that she just broke up with her boyfriend.

I'm with you.   That is the reason I've been so angry with Amy.   However, I no longer believe it is absent.  I think she's hiding it, bottling everything up.   

I really think it will all be revealed when she talks to Sheldon, because as she wants Sheldon to do for her, he's the only one who deserves to know and it doesn't belong to anyone else to do so.    I think it could be a real bonding moment for them for her to tell Sheldon she never stopped loving him, that she's been doing it from a distance while trying to sort things out.

 

I truly hope what you have written comes true, but it remains to be seen.  I feel they've really damaged what was special between this special couple.

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It was clear Amy isn't excited to be out there dating BUT she is putting herself out there.  In directly she is putting herself first, something she hasn't done in a while.  I also do enjoy how she sorta said "FU" to her "friends" who were making fun of her and the mates (this made me sick ALTHOUGH it actually played off better than I thought because it really wasn't her friends pushing her...more them having fun at her expense...not better but less sting).

Last night's episode was pretty boring, and I think the fact that episode 7 was taped before it made it seem sort of pointless since you don't really need it to understand what happens in episode 7 except who Amy is kissing. I do like the idea that this story arc will make Amy stronger and stand up to her friends: and her first order of business should be confronting them about pushing Amy to have the break up they think she needed to have, not the one she actually needed. Not once did they ask if Amy was over Sheldon. Not once did they ask if she wanted to get back together with him. Instead, they pushed this idea of her getting out there and dating other people, got carried away when she mentioned wanting to change her looks, and basically tried to have Amy go through every other rom-com trope without ever asking if it's what she wanted. But I guess my problem with this is that if the writers goal was for Amy to stand up for herself to her friends, and ultimately, Sheldon, then this storyline shouldn't have been necessary in the first place because Amy was always able to stand her ground when she first met Sheldon and the rest of the group. Yes I realize that Amy changed after getting the social life she always wanted but never had, but it's the writers inconsistency in how they've dealt with her character that makes her seem passive in some episodes (not being able to reject Bert because she doesn't want to hurt him or rolling her eyes while biting her tongue when Sheldon ignores her or says something rude) but blunt in others. It almost seems as though this storyline is to get Amy back to being what she already was.

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Sorry but I think you are missing the point here. Has Amy ever stated that she wanted a " normal boyfriend " ? I can think of at least 2 occurences. And why complaining about " getting a distracted make out session in 5 years ". Would she have only thought, 5 years ago, that she would get a make-out session at all?


She's never happy with what he gives. That's a fact.

 

I'm not saying that Sheldon doesn't need to show respect and how important she is.

What I'm saying is that Sheldon is not the only one to blame here. And therefore not the only one to improve for the reconciliation.

They've both changed and like Penny said that's just what relationship does to people. Yes Amy from five years ago wouldn't complaining about "getting a distracted make out session in 5 years". But the old Sheldon can't even touch people let alone kissing.

The point is that emotionally, Sheldon is "there" in their relationship (he's got the ring duh), the same page as Amy. But due to his personality, he doesn't show his true feelings, nor does he do things that matchs his emotions.

And that's unhealty and twisted, both to Amy and to Sheldon.

Amy is not asking Sheldon to be a Prince Charming or anything, she just wants him to be more committed into the relationship. And that wouldn't cause Sheldon any pain. In fact, I believe deep inside, Sheldon wants to be more committed too. Like the psychic said, personally and professionally, everything will fall into place once he commits to her.

As for this breakup, I think neither of them is to blame. What they did showed who they were. But the whole point of this breakup is to change both of them from their old selves. Maybe it's a painful process, but they'll be happier after this. Or a least I believe so.

 
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I think they've shown lots of examples in the show that shows how much Sheldon misses Amy.   He was clearly upset in the 2003 episode when he was resigned that Amy would marry someone so much better than him (1).  His two best friends have told him how miserable he makes Amy (2)He looked heartbroken when Kripke sounded interested in asking Amy out (3)He keeps mentioning relationships because it's clearly weighing on his mind (4).   Why should he say he wants nobody but Amy, when everyone around him is telling him he's not good enough for her in the first place (5)The friends are confirming his belief that she would be happier without him (6).  He's been rejected as a viable option in his head, and he's hurt about it.

How have they shown Amy show she misses Sheldon.  They haven't.  At least not yet.  Their girl's night, she didn't seem heartbroken or sad.  When Penny called her immediately after the break up, she seemed more upset that she wasn't invited to their wedding that the fact that she just broke up with her boyfriend.

I truly hope what you have written comes true, but it remains to be seen.  I feel they've really damaged what was special between this special couple.

1) She was clearly confused in 9.1 about if she was doing the right thing by breaking up with him, also, in ep 5 we can see her walls seem to crumble when she is near him.

2) Her only friends keep reinforcing her feeling that he was making her miserable, that she did right in freeing herself from him and that she was wasting her time with him.

3) She looked heartbroken when he said he had asked other women out.

4) She keeps going round in circles about the dating stuff because she had been interested in it before becoming Sheldon's girlfriend, because Sheldon had told her he's moving on, and before that that she should come back to him because nobody else would want her, and also because her friends are also advicing her to do so.

5) Why should she been shown saying she wants to come back to Sheldon if he is not showing any improvement in the attitude that drove her away from him in the first place?, why after he told her he is moving on, yet confirming her belief that she never was that important to him?

6) Her friends keep telling her that she will do well in moving on and dating other people.

I think it's not that difficult to be able to get Amy's POV even if it's not as heavily showcased as Sheldon's, as in Xbox1orPS4 reply to you,  the hallway scene is very telling, from their attitude when they were confronted (you can see it's difficult for both, if Amy really didn't care, she wouldn't have looked that startled), to her reaction to his words and the things he said to him, like, why do you think she told him she turned down Kripke? don't you think it was a subtle way to tell him she was not interested in dating others yet?

And I don't think that him being convinced he's not good enough for her is mutually exclusive with the chance to hear him say that Amy is the one he truly wants. In fact, I think it's a bad thing that Sheldon's side is the one we are being shown most of the time and in that showcasing we are seeing him as thinking that Amy is a part of his life he can simply replace with someone else, I mean, from Amy's side, you can say it's not clear what she feels, and what about Sheldon? by his actions and words (or lack of them thereof), what is that making clear? that he still wants her or  that he's completely over her and just looking for a replacement?

Edited by sarah7
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I’ve been thinking about the idea of Sheldon & Amy being OOC, and for me it’s not totally that that’s bothering me, it’s just that it’s OOC for the relationship they had and the story they were telling about that relationship. And I guess this is a new phase of that story which is great and all, but I suppose I’m just not enjoying it as much.

 

There’s some troubling implications to me lately that diminish the quirky and lovely match they once were and run counter to what I understood about Shamy in the past:

1. 

That Amy was a doormat the whole time and now that she has learned to speak up and stand up for herself, she did what she should have done awhile ago and break it off with Sheldon. Penny particularly implied this when she said something to the effect of, “I can’t believe Amy had the guts to go through with it.”

2. 

That now that Amy (and Leonard and Penny) has connected Sheldon to his emotions, he can fill the void she left with someone else.

I get that the writers will eventually (hopefully) clear up these misconceptions, but I’m worried about how they’ll do it. (Also as a side note, I’m still in line with Koops and Starsamaria and others who have pointed out that Amy was kind of brash and unapologetic in early seasons so I seriously dislike the implication that she’s always been a wallflower … but I think that ship has sailed.)

I never felt before that Amy didn’t love Sheldon for exactly who he is. All of her lines about loving how he rearranged the cheese aisle and memorized the Pringles can ingredients and calling him her Sweet Baboo painted a really nice picture of how much she was in love with him specifically, not just having a boyfriend. Mayim always made how Amy felt about Sheldon really palpable, and that’s part of why I loved this relationship so much. And sure Amy was hesitant on certain topics, but she also challenged Sheldon and spoke up when things were really bothering her – Mars, intimacy in love spell, etc.

I also feel like they made it clear that Sheldon grew to love Amy specifically. He was starting to understand why he loved Amy – not just because she was like him or did things for him or made him feel safe and status quo-y – but because of who she was. The Christmas episode – although not my favorite episode in general – did a really nice job of showing that Sheldon was starting to understand his connection with Amy better. I feel like the whole point of that episode was that Amy’s happiness legitimately mattered to Sheldon, even when it didn’t benefit him. He wasn’t just admiring her as she watched French movies and listened to harp music, he loved that she loved French movies and harp music – that they made her happy and spoke uniquely to who she is as a person.

I feel like they can still salvage this (I hope) eventual reconciliation by highlighting that these two people do genuinely love each other for who they are, I just hope it’s not glossed over in a quick heavy handed make up. I feel like there’s a lot for them to talk about and convey to the audience and I hope they’re given the room to do it and are able to balance the emotional and comedic elements. This break up has painted their relationship with such broad strokes and big misunderstandings and big emotions (at least from Sheldon). I miss the nuanced growing together that they did in the past and hope some of those subtle notes can be brought out again as they find their way back together.

It was so much fun to see two people fumbling their way through a relationship. Both had some serious issues to work out for themselves and together, but it was so much more interesting to me to see them work it out together. The conversations in love spell and during valentine’s day and prom where they both give a little and realize their mistakes & limitations have so much more texture. I hope we get a chance to see those moments again.

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<snip>

It was so much fun to see two people fumbling their way through a relationship. Both had some serious issues to work out for themselves and together, but it was so much more interesting to me to see them work it out together. The conversations in love spell and during valentine’s day and prom where they both give a little and realize their mistakes & limitations have so much more texture. I hope we get a chance to see those moments again.

All because of Mayim's post, I'm taking the day off from work tomorrow so I can be up for tonight.

I know I'm Shamy obsessed, but I hope tonight is the night those moments start to return.

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 Just a note, this is a ship thread, as a result, derogatory or negative comments about other ships or members of those ships are not allowed here.  Several of the more specific posts have been moved.  If you feel you must use derogatory about other characters, to get your point across, please post those comments in Shipping Lanes.  

Edited by Tensor

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I feel like the message board is going to implose tomorrow morning (French time). Be it positive or negative.

Please, let it be like the ILY time which is so dear to my heart because this is the moment where I've discovered this message board.

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ok...I've just watched the promotional photos of the Spock resonance (Thanks Star!!!) In one of them Sheldon is showing the ring directly to the camera....It must mean something!!! Not sure when, but that video will return at some point... by the way, that picture made me cry!

Edited by mirs1
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ok...I've just watched the promotional photos of the Spock resonance (Thanks Star!!!) In one of them Sheldon is showing the ring directly to the camera....There must mean something!!! Not sure when, but that video will return at some point... by the way, that picture made me cry!

Especially when according to the spoilers he calls Amy and leaves her a VM to tell her that he's being filmed for the documentary and wants her to watch it.   (See the pic of him on the couch with his cell phone.)

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