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[Spoilers] Shamy: Season 9


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So does this mean that if someone is impotent or unable to perform he/she should be deprived of matrimony?  

if they can find aa partner who is satisfied with never having sex then they can have a contractual arrangement they can call a marriage.

An analogy would be fur, faux fur may looek the same and feal almost the same but its not fur its a synthetic construct that looks like fur. A marriage without full physical commitment between the parties may look like marriage but it really isnt.

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I'm sorry but that may be the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.

Marriage is a commitment to give yourself to your partner body and soul  marriage without sex is not a marriage its a contractual arrangement nothing more

This of course does not apply to couples who have had to discontinue sex for physical, age or other varied reasons beyond their control

That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.

If two people get involved and one has an issue with getting physical and needs time and the other is okay with it, then so be it. If the other is NOT okay with it then they can move on. It's as simple as that.

Either Amy will be okay with the possibility that she may have to wait a tad bit longer or she won't. I don't get why that's so hard for people to swallow.

Edited by MJistheBOMB

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if they can find aa partner who is satisfied with never having sex then they can have a contractual arrangement they can call a marriage.

An analogy would be fur, faux fur may looek the same and feal almost the same but its not fur its a synthetic construct that looks like fur. A marriage without full physical commitment between the parties may look like marriage but it really isnt.

I know consummation is important to validate a marriage, and I have always wondered why a marriage can be annulled if the consummation never occurs.  Your explanation kind of answers that question.

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What I'm not understanding is where all this stuff is coming from that says that Sheldon has no intention of having sex with Amy once they get married.

As someone above pointed out, we know he's been working on it since at least the D&D episode.  In that time he's also been working on things like handholding and kissing.  So if he can now take Amy's hand the way he did in the Mars episode, just to announce that they're getting a turtle, and he can be eager to continue their make-out session (like hooligans under the bleachers), then why would people assume that he's planning on having a sexless marriage?

Just because he has not been eager to jump in the sack RIGHT NOW doesn't mean that he plans on making Amy wait more years.  I do think that he probably could intend to wait until they're married (maybe just to please his mother and Meemaw), but there's nothing to really indicate that he intends to make Amy live like a nun once she marries him.

I think he clearly knows that marriage involves sex, but in his mind, a bf/gf relationship doesn't necessarily involve sex.  He's learning what it means to be a boyfriend, but he seems to not be willing to budge on the sex issue at this point, while they're not yet married.

But perhaps his willingness to propose is his way of showing Amy that A: he is committed to her, and B: he is willing to have sex when the time is right--even though that may be after they get married.

I just don't think the story the writers are telling involves a sexless marriage for Sheldon and Amy.  They've never indicated that he would not be able to jump that hurdle.

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Well Sheldon has known Amy five years, if he really wanted to have sex with her he would have by now. I say this with all information of who Sheldon is, but boy he is educated enough, so what really is stopping him? In any case, I Really hope Shamy reconcile. It is the best possible outcome for all parties concerned.

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To me... I don't think it was a joke. He made it perfectly clear that he was willing to "catch Amy's eggs"  and go through with all the prom rituals. :):):) ( but then again...I live in a Shamy dream world:giveheart:) Unfortunately, he panicked...ok... it was expected. There is a lot of pressure for young couples to make whoopie and we know he doesn't want to disappoint. 

I think he is ready to take that final step with Amy... ah..well, maybe after they reconnect, whatever that means for them.

 He started thinking about it in season 6 ( D&D), then reaffirmed it with Penny. It's now season 9- our boy is ready. Shy, but ready. 

I agree. Who knows what would have happened the night he was planning to propose? ;-)

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Well Sheldon has known Amy five years, if he really wanted to have sex with her he would have by now. I say this with all information of who Sheldon is, but boy he is educated enough, so what really is stopping him? In any case, I Really hope Shamy reconcile. It is the best possible outcome for all parties concerned.

So you even know who Sheldon is?  Just because he's known her for five years doesn't mean he was ready for sex.  When he first met her, they weren't even romantically involved.

Education and intelligence have nothing to do with whether or not he's ready to have sex.

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Well Sheldon has known Amy five years, if he really wanted to have sex with her he would have by now. I say this with all information of who Sheldon is, but boy he is educated enough, so what really is stopping him? In any case, I Really hope Shamy reconcile. It is the best possible outcome for all parties concerned.

Sorry but just cause you know about it doesn't nessesarily mean you want it there and then. They both said from the beginning no sexy time just over the period of their relationship Amy's sexual desires have awakened (thank you Kurt) yet Sheldon's, whether he chooses to or not, lay sound asleep. I agree to an extent that they weren't sexually attracted to each other in the beginning but if your around that person enough over a period of time. Some kind of naughty feelings start flowing.

Speaking of educated. You have to think of Sheldon's timeline. He would have been learning about Sex Ed when he was what? 10? 11? Maybe earlier? He sailed through school remember. Unlike normal people those talks at school would have sparked something making you want to know more and discover which leads to loss of viriginity, leading to new experiences etc. etc. where as Sheldon learnt about it pre puberty. It's likely all that info went to the back of his mind thinking 'this isn't effecting me now, moving on' and locked away until it seem nessesarily. Even to this day I'm pretty sure he only really masturbates for health and maybe the occasional thought of what might be under Amy's jumper might creep into his head during but we don't know and that's a whole other can of worms.

There's also his issues with intamacy to bare in mind too. Firstly he was raised a Christian whether he believes in a God now doesn't really matter but things like 'no sex before marriage' might have stuck. Maybe. Secondly, He wants children with Amy, one of the reasons he might have wanted to purpose was so they could marry and have children the natural way without it being a sin. That and he properly wants to raise his children in a loving environment as apposed to the one he grew up in. He saw how his mum gave everything to a relationship that was hopeless and they were married for longer than 14 years and only then it was cause his dad died that it ended. Mary might have stuck at it cause in her eyes it's the 'Christian' thing to do. He was the father of her children and divorce isn't something liked by the bible. Thirdly he probably witnessed the abuse his mum suffered during that period she was with his dad, that's probably scarred him somehow. He doesn't want to be that man so it's made him the opposite, he doesn't drink excessively (unlike his dad), he doesn't drive (unlike his dad). He might be against sex cause of things his dad did (got dark there I apologise, I'm just thinkin outside the box). Might all be why he's so appose to sex. In wedlock of out of wedlock. We don't know. All that lies with Jim, Chuck and his baes.

Bottom line is we don't know why he hasn't slept with Amy but, whether he likes it or not, he definitely wants Amy sexually, he is all kinds of attracted to Amy. He's just not acting on the sexual attraction as of yet. He's accepted all the other kinds of attraction over time. I even think he's now just starting to accept those sexual wants.  Go back and watch his reactions to seeing her in her prom dress, or the school girl outfit. He swallows hard. He's definitely trying to ignore something. Again, why did he lean in again when they were making out on their 5th anniversary? Cause he liked it. More importantly he liked doing it with Amy. God knows where they would have ended if they'd had just made out for ages. Time got them to that spot, time can get them into bed! They'll get there. When Sheldon realises he can be what Amy needs and he has the confidence in himself to provide that there's no stopping them. 

And agreed, they do need to reconcile.

Soon.

Sorry rant over.

Where do these texts come from and how many goats do I have to sacrifice to have them become cannon?

I make them lol stupid little Shamy convos I have in my head haha. Any ideas are welcome! I'm running short.

as for the goat question. 59? :laugh: 

Edited by Amy Fowler

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Do you realize how many successful marriages exist that were not based on some kind of sex test?

MANY people are willing to wait for sex until after the marriage because they believe that marriage is based on more than just sexual compatibility.  If sex is your only test, or a deal breaker before you even get married (and how many times do you try before you decide whether or not it's going to work?  Once? Ten times?) then is that the only reason you're in a relationship?

I think that probably everyone can work out an sexual issues after marriage with a little willingness, practice, and experience.  If they love each other, they can figure out any issues they may have with sex.  What could the issues be, anyway?

 I don't think the story here is that Sheldon will hate sex--no more than him hating kissing or handholding.  I think people seem to want to make up reasons why they NEED to have sex NOW, or else they want to make Sheldon out to be worse than he actually is.

I agree with most of your post, but don't agree with the fact that you attribute sex in a marriage such little importance. Of course it's not the ONLY thing, but IMO it's undeniable it's a VERY IMPORTANT thing. The sex issues could be many, and quite varied, let me tell you. I don't know if it would be too prudent for me to start enumerating possible issues with sex here in the forum.

I think it is a stretch to say that having a ring for Amy meant that sex was on the table right at that moment.  I do believe he had intended to propos at some point in the near future but that was kyboshed by Amy's request for space.  Then further botched by Sheldon going about granting her need for space and are now broken up.  I do believe Sheldon realizes that once married sex is part of that equation for Amy.  Sheldon has been shown in the relationship to have to work his way into the level of intimacy Amy wanted/needed.

Also, I do believe if Amy just goes back to Sheldon without some sort of discussion within the realms of a sitcom that this break up was complete and utter waste of time and space.  I would find it complete CRAP that in off screen land TPTB state Amy has been just taking it and not standing up for herself...and well now she is so in looove after one pleasant afternoon...who cares she will put up with Sheldon and just resume the relationship?  No.  Just no. 

I would rather them stay in friend zone then go back to what was apparently broken in the first place. 

Specially the bolded part, like 1 million times.

Well, I'm sorry but I think saying, "you're supposed to be ready" or "common sense when people are married they'll have sex" is selfish when you consider that not everyone is like you.

I'm willing to put money on it that there are MILLIONS of marriages out there that are working beautifully because the couples have an understanding on all their issues. People who love each will make everything work out for them. If it works for them, they will stay together and if not, they will not....that's it. To say that  people are "supposed" to have sex, this that and the other...I'm sorry. We'll have to agree to disagree on that one.

 

But I think the part that you are forgetting is that we (the audience) and Sheldon know that Amy wants sex, so if he proposes I believe that Amy would be correct in assuming she'll be "getting some" (for lack of a better expression). If he still feels he can't do it, I think he should tell her. Remember this is not to people agreeing on something but two opposing views. Also Sheldon asks her more than once if she's had coitus with any of her dates. If he's not prepared to engage in coitus with her at a certain point in time he has no right to even ask that, does he?

Jenafan...I can see what you are saying and maybe I am not very clear.  Of course, she still loves Sheldon.  You can love someone and not like everything about them.

My point is this which I did say...if Amy has in fact been just taking it all and just putting up with it (paper cuts...wasn't that the term Molaro used) then IMO it's cheap, shoddy writing if she is willing to take Sheldon back without discussing what broke for her in the first place.  JMO-

Again this, like 1 million times.

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I agree with most of your post, but don't agree with the fact that you attribute sex in a marriage such little importance. Of course it's not the ONLY thing, but IMO it's undeniable it's a VERY IMPORTANT thing. The sex issues could be many, and quite varied, let me tell you. I don't know if it would be too prudent for me to start enumerating possible issues with sex here in the forum.

Specially the bolded part, like 1 million times.

But I think the part that you are forgetting is that we (the audience) and Sheldon know that Amy wants sex, so if he proposes I believe that Amy would be correct in assuming she'll be "getting some" (for lack of a better expression). If he still feels he can't do it, I think he should tell her. Remember this is not to people agreeing on something but two opposing views. Also Sheldon asks her more than once if she's had coitus with any of her dates. If he's not prepared to engage in coitus with her at a certain point in time he has no right to even ask that, does he?

Again this, like 1 million times.

My point is that though sex in marriage is of course very important, that doesn't mean that one has to have a sex tryout before marriage.  IMO, again, that's just the latest version of why someone ought to give it up to someone else before the wedding--"Gee, honey, what if we're not compatible?"

But ultimately the point of all of this is that there's nothing that says that Sheldon intends to withhold sex from Amy once they're married.  I think the fact that he's ready to propose, and obviously loves her, shows that he's ready, or will be ready by the time they're married.  The proposal doesn't equal sex, not should it.

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My point is that though sex in marriage is of course very important, that doesn't mean that one has to have a sex tryout before marriage.  IMO, again, that's just the latest version of why someone ought to give it up to someone else before the wedding--"Gee, honey, what if we're not compatible?"

But ultimately the point of all of this is that there's nothing that says that Sheldon intends to withhold sex from Amy once they're married.  I think the fact that he's ready to propose, and obviously loves her, shows that he's ready, or will be ready by the time they're married.  The proposal doesn't equal sex, not should it.

But the proposal should equal the prospect of sex (at a time they both feel comfortable). And your expression of "giving it up" sounds perilously close to you implying a man demanding it from a woman, and that in turn sounds perilously close to prejudice. What I think is that Sheldon should make his position in regards to sex clear before marriage, that's all. And of course nobody knows what Sheldon's thinking exactly, we're all just speculating. 

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I'm really nervous about next week's TR. Anything could happen now.

They won't bring back Dave or Vanessa, right? Or let Amy date another man? Ugh...

 

Since we had a large Shamy episode last time, and they can be in the same room again, I hope we get some kind of group ensemble.  No guest stars.

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So episode 9.09 ends with Amy seemingly distraught over Sheldon's rejection of the GF initiative (lol, that sounds like a title of an episode)... I can't see  episode 9.10 beginning with the group in 4A gobbling down Thai food without Amy's angst being addressed. Or will they? Any thoughts? Will the writers just have the episode take place a few days after that phone conversation, with Amy maybe hungover from a binge or maybe plucking her harp to some Eric Carmen? Maybe they skip the gory details and just have her gutting through it as if some sleepless nights took their toll and she's just a zombie? 

 

I am sooooo hoping that, after a good cry, she comes out the next morning determined to pursue some dialogue with Sheldon!

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I hope this isn't where the car accident the rumor going to happen happens. I seem to recall that happening in one of the better fan fictions I read. That would make an interesting way for them to reunite. I really doubt that's what's on the table though

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I am sooooo hoping that, after a good cry, she comes out the next morning determined to pursue some dialogue with Sheldon!

But what could motivate her to do so? He told her he doesn't want anything else than a friendship with her, before that he also told her he was asking other women out. She knows nothing else except that he seemingly is no more interested in her romantically...

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I agree with most of your post, but don't agree with the fact that you attribute sex in a marriage such little importance. Of course it's not the ONLY thing, but IMO it's undeniable it's a VERY IMPORTANT thing. The sex issues could be many, and quite varied, let me tell you. I don't know if it would be too prudent for me to start enumerating possible issues with sex here in the forum.

Specially the bolded part, like 1 million times.

But I think the part that you are forgetting is that we (the audience) and Sheldon know that Amy wants sex, so if he proposes I believe that Amy would be correct in assuming she'll be "getting some" (for lack of a better expression). If he still feels he can't do it, I think he should tell her. Remember this is not to people agreeing on something but two opposing views. Also Sheldon asks her more than once if she's had coitus with any of her dates. If he's not prepared to engage in coitus with her at a certain point in time he has no right to even ask that, does he?

Again this, like 1 million times.

I haven't at all forgotten what Amy wants in the relationship. She's made it obvious for quite some time. Like I keep saying, this is discussion that they'll need to have that we have not seen yet since the break up. Will Amy say, "sex or no marriage?" I have no idea. Will Sheldon shock her by saying, "I'm ready for sex now but are you ready for me?" I have no idea. LOL. They'll definitely need to talk it out and go from there. Quite frankly, I don't see Amy having to wait much longer for sex anyway, with all the hints he's dropping.

My issue was with people practically  saying he OWES her sex after all these years. NO HE DOES NOT (but again, it's not like he doesn't want it anyway and it's coming). For all we know, she STILL may be willing to wait until he's comfortable. That's just a pet peeve of mine...nothing against anyone. I just like to consider what people have been through in life to become who they are. Some people get sexually abused (whole other topic) and become people who are a lot like Sheldon, you never know what they've been through. Who am I to say, "When you're married, you need to give it up?" LOL. That's something that  the couple has to work out....or not work out.

 

 

 

But what could motivate her to do so? He told her he doesn't want anything else than a friendship with her, before that he also told her he was asking other women out. She knows nothing else except that he seemingly is no more interested in her romantically...

If Amy wants Sheldon is her life at all like he wants her in his life, then she'll be SURE to make it work out. Even if it doesn't happen right away and she needs time to get over his request before jumping back into it, she'll make it work.

Edited by MJistheBOMB

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I haven't at all forgotten that what Amy wants in the relationship. She's made it obvious for quite some time. Like I keep saying, this is discussion that they'll need to have that we have not seen yet since the break up. Will Amy say, "sex or no marriage?" I have no idea. Will Sheldon shock her by saying, "I'm ready for sex now but are you ready for me?" I have no idea. LOL. They'll definitely need to talk it out and go from there. Quite frankly, I do see Amy having to wait much longer for sex anyway, with all the hints he's dropping.

My issue was with people practically OWES her sex after all these years. NO HE DOES NOT. For all we know, she STILL may be willing to wait until he's comfortable.

Not saying that I believe he does but, but are you sure he really doesn't owe anything to her?, not because of the time that had passed, but because he sorta made her a promise, or at least gave her hopes about it (before the D&D game)

Of course that's doesn't mean an absolute obligation, but he surely got into a bigger compromise the moment he told her there was a possibility for them to get intimate, don't you think?

And I'm all for Amy waiting for him to be ready, but I also totally need to see him actively working on getting there (once they get back together, f course), because it's as wrong of her to pressure him as him comfortably staying in his comfort zone and keeping her waiting forever.

If Amy wants Sheldon is her life at all like he wants her in his life, then she'll be SURE to make it work out. Even if it doesn't happen right away and she needs time to get over his request before jumping back into it, she'll make it work.

Speaking of pet-peeves, I find it very unfair when I read about Amy being the one to have to pursue him and do all the hard work, specially because if you think about it, Sheldon did practically nothing to try to get her back, he didn't even said "sorry" once! (at least for insulting her) He tried agressively a couple times at the beginning and then Bam! Full into "moving on" mode.

I know you could also count him trying to propose afterwards, but anyways, it took him too long to react and we must remember she knows nothing about it.

Why couldn't it be at least about the BOTH of them doing stuff to get together again?

Edited by sarah7

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So you even know who Sheldon is?  Just because he's known her for five years doesn't mean he was ready for sex.  When he first met her, they weren't even romantically involved.

Education and intelligence have nothing to do with whether or not he's ready to have sex.

Don't you know by now?

All men are sex crazy humanoids, who can only think of one reason to be with a woman.

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Not saying that I believe he does but, but are you sure he really doesn't owe anything to her?, not because of the time that had passed, but because he sorta made her a promise, or at least gave her hopes about it (before the D&D game)

Of course that's doesn't mean an absolute obligation, but he surely got into a bigger compromise the moment he told her there was a possibility for them to get intimate, don't you think?

And I'm all for Amy waiting for him to be ready, but I also totally need to see him actively working on getting there (once they get back together, f course), because it's as wrong of her to pressure him as him comfortably staying in his comfort zone and keeping her waiting forever.

The thing is, I'm not at all convinced that he WON'T like some others seem to be here. It's CLEAR AS DAY he is...but my point is, he doesn't have to until he's ready and either she can handle that or she can't.

He told her that he's not ruled it out. He never said WHEN.

As for the need to see him working on it: we've seen a lot of change in him over the years and even more change since the 6 months they've been apart. Last time they were together, I saw him going in for another kiss...proving to me that he was INTO her PHYSICALLY. He just happened to screw things up by opening up his mouth about the Flash.

Yes, we'll see once they're back together how he behaves from here but I also need to see them talk about it because who knows who's feelings have changed about what at this point?

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